Newest Bond movie to go 'emo'?
Luke Sleman
Staff Writer
James Bond is going ‘emo’, at least that’s what CNN and other new influential sources are reporting.
What does this mean for James? More importantly what would it mean for his faithful viewers? Could there actually be a more feminine bond than one-timer George Lazenby?
Would his new gadget be an acoustic guitar, with cliché lyrics, laughable riffs and chords? How would he outrun that ridiculous bullet trail in painted-on black jeans and a “My Chemical Panic at the Dashboard Eat World” t-shirt?
At the very least he could slap the baddies around with his studded belt, or bore them to death by playing the same depressing song thirteen times.
Well at least he’d be able to share eyeliner with one of the Bond girls. Imagine the gadgets Q could fit into Bond’s makeup case. Unfortunately for some, but fortunately for the rest of us, this won’t happen.
Those rumors were just that.
There won’t be an “emo” Bond in Quantum of Solace, the first ever direct sequel in the franchise, set for North American release on November 7. The film picks up an hour after the previous movie in the series, Casino Royale.
Quantum begins with Bond seeking vengeance for the death of his love interest in Royale, Vesper Lynd.
Bond takes on the Quantum Organization, and its head honcho, Dominic Greene, played by Mathieu Amalric. Greene and Quantum plan to overthrow Bolivia’s government and take control of its water supply.
Of course it’s up to Bond to stop them, most likely in a beautiful car, dressed in designer clothing with beautiful women by his side. Tough gig.
Evidently, Bond followers were making mountains out of anthills, criticizing some directorial decisions.
Director Marc Forster ,39, the youngest Bond director ever said the location of the film is set to elicit Bond’s “isolation and loneliness.” Directing critically acclaimed movies such as Monster’s Ball and The Kite Runner,”Forster has the résumé that the producers and script call for.
Royale showcased Craig as a more inexperienced and vulnerable Bond, and Forster hopes to extend this trend.
If the world is counting on Bond to save the world for the twentieth time single handedly, shouldn’t he be allowed to emote for a minute or two?
Does the audience really expect him to shrug it off, strap on the Walther and hit on some foreign chick at the main villain’s ball?
Side note here: if you’re planning on ending, conquering, or holding the world ransom, why suddenly have the urge to throw a party when your plan is in the works?
Surely you could wait to show off your car collection, serve some pâté and jump into a three piece tux until after your plan of global domination has come to fruition.
If the audience expects him to seek sympathy from one of the two Bond girls in Quantum, he’ll need to step up his game.
Big news on the set is that Olga Kurylenko won’t land a single kiss with star Daniel Craig. But she doesn’t seem to mind. “Why would I be disappointed? I’m just doing my work,” Kurylenko stated in a recently published CNN article.
Maybe she doesn’t want to be put in the same category as Pussy Galore, Holly Goodhead, Plenty O’Toole and Molly Warmflash. Good for her.
As for Bond, he should be okay with only kissing one girl this time. And you can be sure he won’t be crying in the corner about it, worrying about his make up running.
A more visceral Bond is just what this franchise needs to get the adrenaline pumping again. Casino Royale started it and Quantum of Solace should continue it.